Posted By paul
on January 15, 2012
Whew! I got out of there just in time! From Monday, December 26th to January 2nd, a large contingent of my family and I spent a great week in Key West, Florida. Sunny every day with the temps in the high 70s and a nice breeze, but that was going to change as a cold front was approaching the next day. So good to be back home to single digit wind chills and SNOW!? Yeah, right!
It was surprising to see former Philadelphia Eagles coach and sports commentator, Dick Vermeil, waiting with us at our gate in Philly airport for departure. Even more surprising was seeing him sit right behind us slubbs in economy. I didn’t pester him for an autograph, but did acknowledge him and he shook my hand. Our flight to Miami was smooth and we headed out to Thrifty to pick-up our reserved vehicle. After being told that it would take “a couple of minutes” before they could bring our car around, we were made to wait 54 minutes (our slip was time stamped). We had made the reservation months in advance and confirmed it the day before – sound like a Seinfeld episode? As names were called for people to claim the next car, it became very obvious that my slavic surname was a detriment in this part of the country. Anyway, we were finally on our way to paradise, a mere 160 mile drive on a mostly two-laned road.
Our rental, a 5 bedroom house, with a private pool surrounded by huge palms, was on the end of the famous Duval Street, at the southernmost end. At the other end, about a mile away, is where every night is a party at Mallory Square to watch the sunset and street entertainers and local craftmen and artists. This end is also famous for its bars such as Sloppy Joe’s, The Bull, Hogsbreath, Irish Kevin’s, Schooner Wharf, Rick’s, Cowboy Bill’s (where we caught a ladies’ night bull-riding contest – yes, some wanted to win so…) and many, many more. You hear live music – non-stop – from roughly noon to 4:00 in the morning when the bars close. Of course, there is the obligatory Jimmy Buffett and other island songs, as well as reggae, but mostly classic rock and top 40.
What a great, pleasant surprise it was to walk into Sloppy Joe’s and catch Captain Blue Hen Comic’s own Jason Biel up on the stage! His band, Hyjinx, was the headliner and was booked for the entire week, including the New Year’s weekend! Now that’s impressive – and they deserve it. Do yourself a favor, catch this group when they are in town! Yes, there are other cover bands that have been around longer perhaps, like Captain Kangaroo or whatever, but this is the best of the bunch and… it features a good looking lead singer! No, obviously I’m not talking about Jason, as he is the key-board player and back-up singer, but he did do a solo while we were there and gave Newark, Delaware a shout-out.
New Year’s Day and we had not one, not two, but FOUR iguanas in our back yard! In the morning, we saw one that was at least 4 feet long sunning himself on a branch, high up in one of our trees. He was prehistoric looking with a spiny mane down his back. Later that afternoon, we noticed a smaller (about 12-15″) bright green one hugging the base of one of the palms by the pool and then another one came down that same tree as the big boy and calmly pranced right in front of us to the other side of the yard where we then saw another fairly big one up about head high in another bush. After a while, he pranced back to the original tree. A local claims that there is something called “Iguana Begone” that he uses to keep them away. Hmmm, was he pulling one on us northerners?
For those considering a trip down there, let me share a few thoughts from what I observed and read in a book I bought called “Quit Your Job and Move To Key West“:
The authors of the book suggest that if considering moving there, bring only half of what you think you’ll need, but twice the money. Casual clothes get you in everywhere, but the cost of living is higher.
Best Burger: Our last night, we went to Pat Croce’s (yes, the same Pat Croce from Philadelphia sports and fitness fame) Rum Barrel restaurant. It is a sports bar with TV’s all over the place tuned to different events. It also has an open deck upstairs, but the highlight was their 10 oz. burgers with fries or home-made chips for $10.95! A block off Duval on Front Street.
Cheapest drinks: The Green Parrot! More of a townie bar, but it is famous and should be on any “must see” list. Also, nightly live music.
Most Interactive with the Crowd Bar: Irish Kevin’s. Typically, they have a solo act on stage (starting as early as noon) who tells stories, talks with the customers, has contests, and of course sings. It seems all performers are picked who do this sort of thing. At night, this fairly large place, with several bars is packed. When a group walks in, usually they are asked where they are from. Once the newcomers reveal their home state, the crowd will typically yell out “F – You!” – especially if you’re from New York.
Real Cher
Means of Travel: Bikes and scooters. Parking is at a premium. We had our own driveway and used the mini-van to go to the other side of the island and get provisions at a Publix food store. Otherwise, we walked or took a taxi (flat rate of $3.00 per person) when the night was late. Bike rental for a week ran about $59 and is a nice way to see the entire island – it’s so flat, and the pedaling is easy (sung to “Summertime”). I have visited the cemetery a number of times and have never found the one with the epitaph “I Told You I Was Sick” – but I have seen the postcards of it! Due to its elevation being barely above sea level, the graves are either extremely shallow, many with broken or cracked concrete covers, or above ground.
Diversity: If you are intolerant of those not like you, Key West might not be the place for you. You will see lots of bumper stickers and signs proclaiming “One Human Family” and they practice it in Key West. According to the booklet I purchased, they estimate that about 20-25% of the population is gay. Our group caught a drag queen show New Year’s Eve. It was a riot as the performers exaggerated the stereotypes and lip-synced songs. We saw Cher, Dolly Parton, Joan Crawford and others. During each round, the entertainers would work the crowd for tips, posing for pictures, and “flirt” with the customers. If you’re a homophobe, stay home. At midnight, one of the famous entertainers was dropped in a huge red slipper at midnight.
Free Entertainment: Just walk along the streets! Most bars have open sides and wide doors where you can listen to the live music outside. Of course, there is always people watching and you’ll see all kinds. Don’t forget the Mallory Square enteratiners every night. Then, KW always seems to have any reason to have a parade. We saw a huge bicycle parade, most adorned with Christmas lights. Then we saw a Hannukah parade. There was supposed a “Weiner Dog” parade, which I never caught, but there were loads of dachshunds being walked all over.
Comic Books: Didn’t see a single one anywhere!!! Hmmm… a Captain Blue Hen K.W. wouldn’t have any competition – same as up here! Psych! ‘Til next time.
Category: Paul Mart, Random, Store News |
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Tags: Cher, comics, Cowboy Bill's, Dick Vermeil, Dolly Parton, Eagles, Hogsbreath, Hyjinx, Irish Kevin's, Joan Crawford, Key West, NFL, Rick's, Schooner Wharf, Sloppy Joe's, The Bull, vacation
